“You will stumble least in your judgments, if you yourself stumble least in your life.” – Epictetus
We make judgement calls everyday. Some of them are about the choices we have to make, some of them are about the people we share our lives with, and some of them are a combination of the two. Sometimes our judgment is sound and sometimes we might look back at some of the decisions we’ve made or the people we have allowed to get close to us and wondered what we could have been thinking at the time.
The impulse when the outcome of our judgment leaves something to be desired is to look externally. If only this person would have revealed themselves sooner. If only someone had explained this situation better at some point.
Instead, we should be focusing on controlling the things that we can control, disciplining our emotions, and using these tools to make our decisions. As we get better at this, we will find that our judgment will also improve. We will attract new circles of peers who share a similar mindset, we may inspire our current peers to focus on what they control, and we will enjoy better decision making.
Most importantly, we will enjoy the understanding that we are learning to control the things that are within our control and everything outside of has to be left to fate.
Virtus Fortis Vocat