“Most men ebb and flow in wretchedness between the fear of death and the hardships of life; they are unwilling to live and yet they do not know how to die. For this reason, make life as a whole agreeable to yourself by banishing all worry about it.” – Seneca
The secret to happiness, the secret to success, the secret to better relationships, the secret to more productivity, the secret to a better life, the secrets are all the same. If we want the things listed here, we need to understand that it is all about control.
We have a very limited amount of things that we are control over. They are limited mostly to the space we occupy. We control ourselves, our attitudes, our actions, our thoughts, our emotions, and our reactions to everything that happens to us. Or at least, we can learn to control those things.
It starts by learning to detach from situations and look at them from the outside. Asking ourselves what we look like, how we sound, what role we are playing in the situation, and most importantly how we can improve on any of this.
Because that is all we can improve on. We can not change the actions, thoughts, or attitudes of others any more than we can change the weather or the time of day.
But once we do learn to focus on what we can control, we will start to see that almost all of our frustrations, our distractions, our obstacles, involved us trying to force a situation we could never have control of into our sphere of influence.
When we stop doing that we can focus our energy on the things we can control.
When we do that, we see positive results.
Repeat as necessary.
virtus fortis vocat