“”Pleasure, unless it is kept within bounds, tends to rush headlong into the abyss of sorrow.” – Seneca
There is nothing wrong with us enjoying ourselves. Good times, especially those spent with people we care about build relationships and strengthen bonds. Even on our own, there are things we may find pleasurable that are not in and of themselves bad things.
But even when we enjoy ourselves with our loved ones, even the most important of pleasures we enjoy within the most important of relationships we have, can be taken too far. And when we do start to focus only on the pleasure, only on the good times, even the strongest of relationships will start to feel shallow and unfulfilling. Even the strongest bonds will start to break down and relationships can become damaged.
How can we avoid this? Oddly enough, we avoid damaging relationships with too much pleasure in the same way that we strengthen ourselves against too much luxury, by struggling and focusing on building something worthwhile. And when we do that with our friends and loved ones, we develop stronger bonds and better relationships.
We do this by looking for opportunities to grow together as people. With life partners, family members and close personal friends this is easier as those bonds have been made and open lines of communication have been established.
With people a little further outside of our circle, sharing these struggles and finding common goals will be harder, but it will also be worth it. Detaching from our current situation with the goal of finding these opportunities in our work lives, our neighborhoods, and other communities will be well worth the effort.
virtus fortis vocat